everything & nothing

Mistakes are universal, forgiveness should be too.

We all make mistakes, this is universally accepted and understood. Perfection does not exist. We are all flawed, regrets are real, and we have all wished we could go back in time and undo the damage. A vast majority of people will say that the mistakes they’ve made have molded them into the person they are today and I am one of them. I have fallen on my face, experienced heartache, regretted a one night stand (…or two.), disrespected my parents, ended great friendships, and the list can go on forever but the fact is that each of these situations taught me something and have inevitably played a role in creating who I am today. But where do we draw the line? After how many mistakes do we just stop forgiving and understanding an individual? How many times is it socially acceptable to use the phrase “everybody makes mistakes” or “its only human?” Mistakes, flaws, and regrets are what make us and yet we’re all striving for some kind of perfection. I would absolutely love to believe that everyone is like me in the sense that they do something, realize it was wrong, ask for forgiveness, and understand that being forgiven is truly a blessing and was more than likely incredibly difficult for that person to do. However, we all know the people that will be forgiven and constantly expect that forgiveness from there on out, even for committing the very same act in which they asked for forgiveness in the first place. 

Okay. Now lets go in a completely different direction. Lets say someone made a mistake and really hurt someone, first time offender, and that “someone” just absolutely refuses to try to understand and refuses to be forgiving? Is that unfair? I always (99.99% of the time) try to put myself in that persons shoes, I try to ask myself how I would feel if that was me and how it would feel to not even be given a chance. Now I do not think you have to continue in whatever relationship you were in with this person (be it a friendship, family, or romantic) but I do believe everyone should be told that they are forgiven, whether you understand how or why they did it or not, they should know that you forgive them for making a mistake and for being at such a point in life that your judgement could be so cloudy and off. Not to go off on an unrealistic rampant but its like in the tv shows, lets say…Law & Order SVU where a female is raped and later down the line comes in contact with her assailant and she tells him that she forgives him. That she forgives him for whatever happened in his life that convinced him that he could do something like that, its those moments (however unrealistic and probably very, very rare in reality) that really touch me and get the gears in my head turning. 

Perfection is nonexistent and it is entirely too unfair to hold someone to that standard. What if you are guilty of the same thing? Or what if you aren’t but later on in life you do the exact same thing as the person in which you refuse to forgive? If you don’t forgive someone to keep the relationship I believe you should at least forgive to move on, for both parties, to have peace of mind, to carry on to the next thing…the next thing that I guarantee wont be perfect either, not even close. 

P.S

Found a better example in one of my favorite shows. Click here to watch a clip.